What’s your love and relationship problem?
Ask Meredith at Love Letters. Yes, it’s anonymous.
1. I’m looking for letters. Send your questions about dating/love/relationships to this anonymous form or to [email protected] . December is a weird time to date – or to bring your single life/relationship around others. I would like to hear stories about how that’s going – and what’s bothering you.
2. I wanted to post this update before everyone gets busy with the holidays. This one felt like it could be an entire podcast episode? Maybe I’ll ask for that. Also, I have questions about how many couples write in letters.
Be safe this weekend, and again, reach out with your issues, as I am still testing positive in isolation. 🙂 – Meredith
Here’s what has happened since: First, I’d like to emphasize that neither my husband nor I ever had a physical affair. Ever! That was one of the most common assumptions in the comments.
Second, I’m happy to report no divorce has, nor likely will, happen. There was one comment (first letter) in particular that hit me – something along the lines of “This happened to my parents; they worked through it and had a great final eight years of their marriage before dad died.”
A note to those commenters who post hopeful, positive comments: you do get listened to.
Third and probably most humorously: after the first letter was published, a long series of events caused me to think about the afterlife – something I’d never done before due to my atheist roots. For those of you who are religious, many of us heathen have really *never* given it any consideration, even well into adulthood. I started reading books and listening to as many non-crazy of podcasts on near-death experiences as I could find to decide whether or not an afterlife exists and, if so, what it is like (this started long before the movie After Death came out, btw).
The patterns that show up across believable NDE accounts are remarkably consistent and clear: 1) an afterlife obviously exists and 2) we all seem to be souls in pre-planned dramas that require exercising free will to learn about suffering, grow in empathy, and (hopefully) increase the goodness and love in the world. Really – do some serious looking into NDEs and those are some of the many conclusions you will arrive at. An additional conclusion is that 3) reincarnation is a thing.
So, I ended up with a better understanding of my current purpose on Earth (with hopes of a happier next go-around, too). In some spiritual realm, I sat (floated?) and willingly planned out every event that has caused me sorrow, pain, affliction, resentment, joy, bliss, satisfaction, pride, etc., so that my eternal self could grow in empathy and love. It is quite a revelation to have and I highly recommend it to others. After additional soul searching (pun intended, of course), I now believe that to fulfill my life’s purpose I should stay in the marriage, make it as happy & loving as possible (especially for the kids), and work to lift up as many others around me as possible. I will not comment otherwise on our marriage except to say that my husband has started becoming similarly convinced, and knowing the rules and goals of the game helps everyone play it much better.
TLDR; the transcendental nature of life and the universe saved my marriage. Let the comments begin!
Have advice for today’s letter writer? Be helpful. Be clever. Get your comment featured here.Meredith
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