I thought I was on a romantic getaway with my partner. Actually, it was her conference, and I was the arm-candy – although it didn’t end up feeling that way.  

The first evening, there was a reception for the conference attendees. My partner was a little nervous, as she hadn’t had to network in a while. After she left for the hall, I took the opportunity to explore the hotel property. About 30 minutes before the end of the reception, I texted her to see if she was OK and heard nothing back. Now keep in mind, she is a person who normally is constantly on her phone and typically very responsive.

At the end of the reception, I walked down near the entrance and saw a lot of people walking out. I texted again to check if she was already out and where we should meet, and again I heard nothing. About 30 minutes after the end of the reception, there were now very few people coming out of the reception hall and I thought, maybe I missed her. But why hadn’t she texted? So again, I texted her and received no response 

At this point, I peeked into the reception hall to see if she was even there. I saw her across the hall seemingly enthralled in a conversation with a guy. She appeared captivated in her conversation so much so that she didn’t even notice that the place had thinned out and the staff was cleaning up the hall. What was I to make of this? Had she forgotten me?

Suddenly I felt a bit jealous of the way they were closely conversing, so I stepped outside of the hotel to clear my head. About 15 minutes later, she finally texted me saying she was heading up to our room but said nothing about my texts which seemed odd. About 30 minutes later, I headed back up to my room. I asked if she had seen any of my texts, and she said she had her phone in her purse so she hadn’t seen them until just now. It was like she didn’t want to acknowledge them. I said I had tried to contact her and to see if she was fine, where she might be, and what else we might do for the evening. She said she was networking and lost track of time. 

Then I said, I peaked inside the hall and you “you seem enthralled” in your conversation. She got a little defensive, then trivialized this saying she wasn’t enthralled, just engaged. I said, OK, but this isn’t like you, to not check your phone knowing your partner would be waiting for you after the reception. Normally she typically checks her messages regularly due to her busy work. In addition, I said, you were seemingly only talking to this one guy, whom I learned was from her office back home, and also didn’t even notice the crowd thinning out. Her response was, “You know it’s hard for me to network.” We then went to bed.

I woke up the next morning feeling a bit wronged from the previous night. I said this to her and she apologized several times. I said it was going to take me some time to get through this feeling. She then surprisingly got mad at me saying that I was the one ruining our trip and that I was questioning her loyalty, and even cried a little bit. The irony is that I ended up apologizing to her.  

A couple of weeks later, I reflected on this, and it’s leaving me confused. Was this just a fluke in her behavior? Should I be worried about the guy from her office? What do I make of this?    

– Feeling Confused