What’s the best dating app for me?

Send your relationship and dating question today. Are you sick of apps? In a relationship that doesn’t make sense? Wondering what’s next? Get it off your chest.

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Q.

I like your style, approach to advice, and the podcast. I’m ready to start dating again after divorcing 12 years ago. I’m now retired, 68, and have been urged by my sister and her savvy daughter to try the dating site Hinge. Your thoughts?

I tend to be attracted to Jewish men like my ex, who is now one of my closest friends – smart with humor and all round mensch. I’m not interested in hookups. There are so many dating sites, and I wondered if you might have suggestions about what to look for, as it might not be appropriate for you to support on site over another. Thank you.

– Considering 

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A.

Dating apps change a lot – there are always new people joining/ deleting their accounts – so I wouldn’t be able to tell you that one is better than the other, even if I wanted to.

I’ve seen so many of them. I’ve written about a bunch, even a new one called Lola (I think it launches next month) that aims to get members to go on dates soon – instead of messaging for weeks until the excitement fizzles. 

I do like Hinge, personally. I happen to like the question prompts, and I think it’s an easy-to-read platform. That’s the thing you’ll want to decide – what it looks like to you. Dating apps are better when they feel intuitive … and maybe a little bit pretty to look at. If you find yourself confused, overwhelmed, or frustrated by a platform, move on to another. It’s a very subjective thing.

Have your friend and her daughter show you a few options and pick the one that looks like the most fun to use. Also decide whether the app is best as is or if it’s worth paying for a better membership. Sometimes spending some money allows you to see more people at once. For some users, seeing less is better because they don’t want to spend too much time looking, in general.

The other point I’ll make is that as much as you adore your ex – which is so great! – you might like people who aren’t like him at all. Just a thought. If it’s important to date a Jewish person, great. But if that desire is about duplicating an experience, know that anyone else will be different. You might benefit from considering all kinds of people.

– Meredith

Readers? Advice on choosing an app? What have you liked and why?

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